i'm in pain
::groans:: i'm so tired
but letting God pull me out of a rut never felt so good
i'm over halfway there the end is just up the way
i'm in the final stretch and i won't let myself get down
the crystal method - name of the game
11/23/2004
11/21/2004
11/19/2004
11/17/2004
praise the Lord
This is for katy, to katy, written... on the date below...
i still love you
"(Jan 13, Tuesday, 12-something a.m.)
why am i always pulled back to these text documents... maybe because they are easily accessible... maybe because they are not easily seen...
i am very happy tonight.
so happy.
it is the second day i have seen my katy (today is Jan. 13, Tuesday, the early morning of the first day of school- spring semester)
yesterday, i got to see my katy for the FIRST time in nearly a month.
i was at first startled to hear the rap at the window pane in luscious and chase's room, as i sat there eating pepperoni-papa john's dipped in that garlic sauce stuff.
i knew she was around, unpacking and whatnot. i was trying to eat fast.
we were watching the simpsons, which was a funny episode actually - Bart got this big-kid bike that had 10 speeds (he threw his old one in front of that weird black doctor's mercedes cause his dad said
if he broke his old one, he would get a new good one "no questions asked")
anyway, bart is drivin down the street, showin off to the dudes he thinks are cool, the delinquents with like, skull shirts and long hair, and suddenly the bike falls into pieces.
so his dad is down cause his son says he can't do things right and...
someone yells out of the blue, "Thaddaeus.... Thaaaadaeussss.... your womans looking for youuu.....Thaaaddaeuuuusss..."
i'm like, "uh...OK......O...OKAAAYY!!... Just a second...."
suddenly there's this rap, and my heart stops and says, "thaddaeus, she's here"
i am like just walkin out of the room and i look out and see these beady squinty (smiley) eyes just hoverin above the window sill, and my heart leaps in joy.
i can hear her squeakin "hi! Hi!" at the guys in the room, so i run out and trot outside and put my orange cup (it had guava nectar in it) down and put the pizza leftover in the cup and i see her.
she is wearin this pillowy baby-blue lookin coat. i'm thinkin... "is that new? she looks so good...is that a new coat?.... man i must smell like nasty pizza...."
but she comes up to me with a smile and big eyes and just hugs me.
and i hold her.
and i'm so happy.
my heart and my breath just relaxes and seems to float around me dizzily, giddily, dreamily....
it feels freeing and relieving to hold her again.
and then tonight we walked around... and talked about stuff... i tried to recall what i thot about the New Year's Incident - how i felt about it. i told her what i could. i held her the whole time, so i didn't see her face.
it was good to say it, but it seemed better for her to hear it. i'm glad.
she is so beautiful.
in every way.
i missed her so much.
i love this katy"
This is for katy, to katy, written... on the date below...
i still love you
"(Jan 13, Tuesday, 12-something a.m.)
why am i always pulled back to these text documents... maybe because they are easily accessible... maybe because they are not easily seen...
i am very happy tonight.
so happy.
it is the second day i have seen my katy (today is Jan. 13, Tuesday, the early morning of the first day of school- spring semester)
yesterday, i got to see my katy for the FIRST time in nearly a month.
i was at first startled to hear the rap at the window pane in luscious and chase's room, as i sat there eating pepperoni-papa john's dipped in that garlic sauce stuff.
i knew she was around, unpacking and whatnot. i was trying to eat fast.
we were watching the simpsons, which was a funny episode actually - Bart got this big-kid bike that had 10 speeds (he threw his old one in front of that weird black doctor's mercedes cause his dad said
if he broke his old one, he would get a new good one "no questions asked")
anyway, bart is drivin down the street, showin off to the dudes he thinks are cool, the delinquents with like, skull shirts and long hair, and suddenly the bike falls into pieces.
so his dad is down cause his son says he can't do things right and...
someone yells out of the blue, "Thaddaeus.... Thaaaadaeussss.... your womans looking for youuu.....Thaaaddaeuuuusss..."
i'm like, "uh...OK......O...OKAAAYY!!... Just a second...."
suddenly there's this rap, and my heart stops and says, "thaddaeus, she's here"
i am like just walkin out of the room and i look out and see these beady squinty (smiley) eyes just hoverin above the window sill, and my heart leaps in joy.
i can hear her squeakin "hi! Hi!" at the guys in the room, so i run out and trot outside and put my orange cup (it had guava nectar in it) down and put the pizza leftover in the cup and i see her.
she is wearin this pillowy baby-blue lookin coat. i'm thinkin... "is that new? she looks so good...is that a new coat?.... man i must smell like nasty pizza...."
but she comes up to me with a smile and big eyes and just hugs me.
and i hold her.
and i'm so happy.
my heart and my breath just relaxes and seems to float around me dizzily, giddily, dreamily....
it feels freeing and relieving to hold her again.
and then tonight we walked around... and talked about stuff... i tried to recall what i thot about the New Year's Incident - how i felt about it. i told her what i could. i held her the whole time, so i didn't see her face.
it was good to say it, but it seemed better for her to hear it. i'm glad.
she is so beautiful.
in every way.
i missed her so much.
i love this katy"
everyone better feel sorry for me! on monday the 22nd i am expected to complete:
*a music (listening) exam
*a 5-15 pg. report studying ALL the events of political corruption recorded in relevant periodicals for the year 1993
*a 5+ pg. website review on my pick of website (from list) about Chinese History
*a 10 minute art/music composition that i must present to the class (i'm gonna do an art thing), convey the relevance of, and "further relate the work to similar selections or previously studied materials."
OOHHHHHHHHHH!!!
AAARRRRRRRRGGGHHHH!!!
AAAIIIIEEEEE!!
SO MUCH PAIN!!
in the meantime i had assignment due on monday, a 2 hour required (juniors and above) english placement exam last evening, a job to work at, sleep to get, and personal issues to "develop."
honestly, i don't know why this is humorous to me now - this is the closest i've ever been to nervous breakdown, and all i can do right now is smile. albeit dumbly.
plan: email all (involved) teachers and ask if any/all could extend a special deadline for their beloved thaddaeus, pray alot (this will be the most help)
*a music (listening) exam
*a 5-15 pg. report studying ALL the events of political corruption recorded in relevant periodicals for the year 1993
*a 5+ pg. website review on my pick of website (from list) about Chinese History
*a 10 minute art/music composition that i must present to the class (i'm gonna do an art thing), convey the relevance of, and "further relate the work to similar selections or previously studied materials."
OOHHHHHHHHHH!!!
AAARRRRRRRRGGGHHHH!!!
AAAIIIIEEEEE!!
SO MUCH PAIN!!
in the meantime i had assignment due on monday, a 2 hour required (juniors and above) english placement exam last evening, a job to work at, sleep to get, and personal issues to "develop."
honestly, i don't know why this is humorous to me now - this is the closest i've ever been to nervous breakdown, and all i can do right now is smile. albeit dumbly.
plan: email all (involved) teachers and ask if any/all could extend a special deadline for their beloved thaddaeus, pray alot (this will be the most help)
11/16/2004
"johnhopkins17: man my baggles molded (just a little bit of random news)
N3rmal: baggles...molded...????????
johnhopkins17: yea isnt that what the green stuff is
N3rmal: wtf
N3rmal: ohhhhh - "BAGELS"
johnhopkins17: they were white, now they are like green
N3rmal: as in the round bready things?
johnhopkins17: lol
johnhopkins17: yea
johnhopkins17: whats a baggle?
N3rmal: ahhaha - i'm putting this on my blog, lol
N3rmal: a baggle is a misspelled word (it's nothing)
johnhopkins17: oh
johnhopkins17: i see
N3rmal: hehe
johnhopkins17: so a baggle is a mispelled word?
N3rmal: say something else funny so i can put it on my blog too!!
johnhopkins17: so you can baggle a bagel?
N3rmal: hahahahahhaa
N3rmal: your such a 'tard
johnhopkins17: lol
johnhopkins17: "it is profitable if one is wise to seem foolish" - Aeschylus
N3rmal: nice
johnhopkins17: thats my favorite quote
N3rmal: i remember
johnhopkins17: cause i can always use it as an excuse
N3rmal: haha
johnhopkins17: lol
N3rmal: exactly :-D
johnhopkins17: john hopkins, comming to a nuclear reactor near you"
now everyone scratch your head, say "dDDAAAAAAAAAA!!!" and wiggle those phalanges in front of you!!
Blank & Jones - D-Battery
N3rmal: baggles...molded...????????
johnhopkins17: yea isnt that what the green stuff is
N3rmal: wtf
N3rmal: ohhhhh - "BAGELS"
johnhopkins17: they were white, now they are like green
N3rmal: as in the round bready things?
johnhopkins17: lol
johnhopkins17: yea
johnhopkins17: whats a baggle?
N3rmal: ahhaha - i'm putting this on my blog, lol
N3rmal: a baggle is a misspelled word (it's nothing)
johnhopkins17: oh
johnhopkins17: i see
N3rmal: hehe
johnhopkins17: so a baggle is a mispelled word?
N3rmal: say something else funny so i can put it on my blog too!!
johnhopkins17: so you can baggle a bagel?
N3rmal: hahahahahhaa
N3rmal: your such a 'tard
johnhopkins17: lol
johnhopkins17: "it is profitable if one is wise to seem foolish" - Aeschylus
N3rmal: nice
johnhopkins17: thats my favorite quote
N3rmal: i remember
johnhopkins17: cause i can always use it as an excuse
N3rmal: haha
johnhopkins17: lol
N3rmal: exactly :-D
johnhopkins17: john hopkins, comming to a nuclear reactor near you"
now everyone scratch your head, say "dDDAAAAAAAAAA!!!" and wiggle those phalanges in front of you!!
Blank & Jones - D-Battery
11/15/2004
11/10/2004
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